What are your three favorite television dramas of all time?
Mad Men. Breaking Bad. Misfits.
What are your three favorite television comedies of all time?
I Love Lucy. Parks and Recreation. Portlandia
What prematurely aborted or cancelled television series (and its consequent lack of closure) has left you utterly empty inside?
United States of Tara. The show reached its peak of interestingness right when it was canceled. Am I supposed to say Arrested Development here? I feel like I’m not saying Arrested Development enough. I like to think there is an alternate version of this survey where all answers are Arrested Development. Arrested Development. Arrested Development.
What do you consider to be the most satisfying television series finale ever?
Lost. It helped me realize how much time I spend watching TV and the value of it.
What is a favorite film that you consider to be obscure or unknown to others?
I don’t think Burn After Reading gets enough credit for how good it is. The movie had a dildo chair! Oscar nominated writers/directors made a movie where a plot point was a dildo chair. A dildo chair!
What is a film you have seen that you consider to be an unforgivable waste of your precious time?
No time is wasted. You can’t waste something you can never save. Full disclosure: I’m drunk.
What are your three favorite films of all time?
Children of Men. The Graduate. Lost in Translation
Who are three film directors whose work you admire?
Stanley Kubrick. P.T Anderson. Woody Allen.
What are your three favorite music groups?
Jay-Z. Bob Dylan. If repetition determines favorite then number three is Taylor Swift. The copy center at my office LOVES Taylor Swift, They play it none stop. Most days go by with me humming Taylor Swift. Let me change my answer. Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift.
Who is your favorite dead musician of any era?
What are your three desert island albums?
The three albums that taste the best.
What music group or performer would you like to punch in the face?
What’s the point? I punch some rich person in the face. They go home and make out with other famous people and I go home to eat frozen pizza. There is no endgame. I’ll hug Prince. He is so tiny. Pocket sized human.
What are your three favorite books?
A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway. A Long Way Down by Nick Hornby. Animal Farm by George Orwell
What well known voice would you like to have read you to sleep each night?
Who is your favorite stand-up comic?
I really like Hannibal Buress. His pickle juice bit is the best. Bing it. Wasn’t it weird in the new Spiderman movie, Peter Parker Binged something? This dude is supposed to be smart but he uses Bing. The f#@k?
Who is your favorite cartoon character?
Who is your favorite fictional villain?
Who is your favorite fictional hero?
Who are your favorite sports teams?
Arsenal. Tampa Bay Rowdies. Orlando Magic.
What fantasy sports do you play?
English Premier League. Mostly because I hate myself. If I went to Taco Bus right now, how quick do you think I can get a burrito? I know they are open 24 hours but I don’t really want to put pants on. Ugh. I need a butler.
What are your best sports moments as a fan?
The easiest question! The 2012 NASL Soccer Bowl finals second leg.